


ice skate support group

by shizuoh



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Chatting & Messaging, Fluff, Genderfluid Katsuki Yuuri, Memes, Mild Sexual Content, Multi, Skype, agender viktor, copious amounts of random references, in the forms of references and jokes, no angst we die like men, trans!yurio and phichit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-30
Updated: 2016-12-30
Packaged: 2018-09-13 07:23:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9112579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shizuoh/pseuds/shizuoh
Summary: nikiminaj:wow i love all the professional figure skaters! katsuki yuuri, yuri plisetsky, and... *looks at scribbled writing on hand* pitch it chew on thatphichit:im changing my name to that





	

**Author's Note:**

> nikiminaj - viktor  
> pitch it chew on that - phichit  
> katsudom - yuuri  
> lolcat - yurio  
> Superior Gay - sara  
> Inferior Gay - michele  
> nekola - emil  
> babecheva - mila  
> seung - seung-gil lee  
> not a chicken - minami  
> Nut Button - chris

_December 29, 2016_

[ _02:24_ ]

 

 **babecheva:** we should start talking in this chat again

 **Superior Gay:** yeah why'd we stop

 **babecheva:** was it cuz we were #busy

 **Superior Gay:** everyone is dead rest in pepperoni

 **nikiminaj:** pepperoni is DISGUSTING and i REFUSE to rest in it

 **katsudom:** here we go

 **Superior Gay:** welcome home

 **phichit:** o god what everyone is TALKING AGAIN (*ﾟﾛﾟ)

 **lolcat:** ew

 **babecheva:** its ok yura u can admit ur love for me

 **Superior Gay:** um excuse me

 **babecheva:** bby its ok u know im gay af

 **Superior Gay:** (:

 **Inferior Gay:** ):

 **Superior Gay:** oh please we're all gay and in relationships

 **phichit:** im not 

 **lolcat:** me neither

 **Superior Gay:** are you denying the gay part

 **phichit:** how dare you assume im straight

 **lolcat:** i just dont care

 **seung:** i relate

 **katsudom:** pls my phone can't keep up with all the messages

 **phichit:** then upgrade bitch

 **katsudom:** you leave my iphone 5 out of this

 **nikiminaj:** hey i offered 2 buy u a 7 but NOO

 **katsudom:** me and my 5 have been through a lot

 **lolcat:** lmao

 **katsudom:** shut up yurio you have an android

 **phichit:** SNAP

 **lolcat:** ONLY BECAUSE MY PHONE BROKE

 **nikiminaj:** yea didnt u drop it lmao

 **lolcat:** fuck off u drop ur phone 10 times a day

 **babecheva:** discourse discourse

 **nikiminaj:** love the discourse

 **nikiminaj:** actually

 **katsudom:** viktor no

 **nikiminaj:** coleslaw

 **nikiminaj:** discuss

 **lolcat:** its gross

 **nikiminaj:** son im so proud of u

 **phichit:** #bad

 **nekola:** i like it

 

_**nikiminaj** has removed **nekola** from the chat_

 

 **phichit:** SAVAGE

 **babecheva:** HFBIERFHERU IM PSISING

 **nikiminaj:** ANYBODY ELSE

 **Superior Gay:** ive never had it so

 **nikiminaj:** good dont taste it

 **nikiminaj:** tis the devils food

 **phichit:** im dead are u just gonna leave him out

_**nikiminaj** has added **nekola** to the chat_

 

 **nekola:** forgive me

 **nikiminaj:** new friends who dis

 **katsudom:** vitya dont be mean

 **nikiminaj:** sorry daddy

 **katsudom:** FSBIGRFNDDE

 **phichit:** WHOA

 **Superior Gay:** i'm sorry but WHAT

 **babecheva:** cant u guys read yuuris name jesus

 **nikiminaj:** IM KIDDING

 **nikiminaj:** kind of

 **lolcat:** wtf ew

 **babecheva:** yuri is only a child dont expose him to this kind of adult nonsense

 **lolcat:** fuck u im almost 16

 **babecheva:** yeah in like 3 months

 **lolcat:** still almost

 **katsudom:** I cant believe this

 **Inferior Gay:** yikes

 **Superior Gay:** seconded

 **babecheva:** thirdended

 **lolcat:** thats not a word

 **babecheva:** ur not a word

 **nikiminaj:** children play nice

 **katsudom:** I thought yurio was our only child

 **lolcat:** wait what

 **nikiminaj:** i mean we can adopt mila on the side

 **babecheva:** nice

 **Superior Gay:** yurio is my brother in law

 **lolcat:** u guys arent MARRIED

 **lolcat:** and they arent my dads

 **katsudom:** accept us

 **nikiminaj:** we r one big family u gotta fit in somehere

 **nikiminaj:** yurio u live with us

 **nikiminaj:** we all live together

 **nikiminaj:** we eat breakfast together

 **nikiminaj:** we go to the rink together

 **lolcat:** ...i see ur point

 **babecheva:** aw

 **lolcat:** no

 **phichit:** i cant believe ur screen name is "lolcat" like what kind of downgraded meme

 **lolcat:** yours isnt even a meme??

 **phichit:** i cant think of anything Funny

 **katsudom:** weak

 **nikiminaj:** get with the memes bro

 **Superior Gay:** who is the meme master here

 **Superior Gay:** it's not me because mila always updates me

 **katsudom:** Its viktor

 **nikiminaj:** hes right

 **nikiminaj:** i always have a meme at the ready

 **phichit:** i bet i can rival that

 **nikiminaj:** u cant even figure out a meme that corresponds with ur name

 **nikiminaj:** get on my level bitcjh

 **katsudom:** rekt

 **lolcat:** you guys are stupid

 **nikiminaj:** #bitcjh

 **babecheva:** i like how we're all collectively awake at 2 am

 **phichit:** great minds think alike

 **lolcat:** i beg to differ

 **Superior Gay:** ah yes, us, the professional figure skaters,

 **Inferior Gay:** you all should be sleeping

 **phichit:** why sleep when u can meme

 **nikiminaj:** wow i love all the professional figure skaters! katsuki yuuri, yuri plisetsky, and... *looks at scribbled writing on hand* pitch it chew on that

 **phichit:** im changing my name to that

_**phichit** has changed their name to **pitch it chew on that**_

 

 **pitch it chew on that:** i bow down to you, meme master

 **nikiminaj:** thx

 **nikiminaj:** wwait before we continue

 **nikiminaj:** dogs or cats

 **pitch it chew on that:** hamsters

 **katsudom:** and every month we buy a hamster

 **nikiminaj:** katsuki yuuri consider urself blockedt

 **lolcat:** cats

 **nikiminaj:** wrong

 **nikiminaj:** dogs

 **katsudom:** dogs

 **seung:** dogs

 **nikiminaj:** i like u

 **nekola:** cats

 **nekola:** get it bc. neko

 **nikiminaj:** no

 **katsudom:** grbfnresk ur so MEAN TO HIM

 **nekola:** i just want love

 **Superior Gay:** no love we die like men

 **nekola:** tfw ur bf is never on the chat

 **nekola:** BABE DEFEND ME

 **Inferior Gay:** im BUSY

 **nekola:** well u should be busy with ME

 **Superior Gay:** shut up yall

 **nikiminaj:** yall r fuckin gay lol

 **katsudom:** vitya we are engaged. we live together

 **nikiminaj:** we're all fuckin gay lol

 **phichit:** i still think hamsters are the best

 **nikiminaj:** dont say it yuuri

 **lolcat:** i dont get it whats the joke

 **Superior Gay:** explain.................

 **nikiminaj:** NO ITS STUPID

 **katsudom:** viktor is a dnp stan

 **nikiminaj:** FBEIUFENS I TRUSSTED OYU

 **lolcat:** arent they those fuckin nerds viktor watches all the time

 **nikiminaj:** dont out me like this

 **nikiminaj:** this is abuse i dont desserve thsi

 **babecheva:** i went to the tour

 **nikiminaj:** YEAH I KNOW U DID U WHORE

 **babecheva:** (((:

 **nikiminaj:** fucdsnufs

 **katsudom:** hey

 **katsudom:** hey vitya

 **nikiminaj:** what

 **katsudom:** phil is almost 30

 **nikiminaj:** STOP

 **Superior Gay:** i dont get it

 **Inferior Gay:** me neither

 **pitch it chew on that:** i dont understand...............

 **nikiminaj:** phil lester, if ur out there,

 **katsudom:** just ignore him

 **katsudom:** u know whats good? ariana grande

 **pitch it chew on that:** GOOD SHIT

 **katsudom:** "dangerous woman" is such a bop

 **lolcat:** i can hear viktor crying from here

 **katsudom:** hes fine

 **seung:** go to bed my phone is blowing up

 **pitch it chew on that:** theres a mute option

 **seung:** no mute we die like men

 **pitch it chew on that:** we're all fucking memers i cant believe this

 **lolcat:** stop

 **katsudom:** collaborate 

 **pitch it chew on that:** AND LISTEN

 

_**lolcat** has left the chat_

 

_**katsudom** has added **lolcat** to the chat_

 

 **lolcat:** leave me alone

 

 

[ _12:45_ ]

 

 **babecheva:** do you ever just realize how everyone here is either genderqueer, queer, or both

 **nikiminaj:** ohymgod,,,,,,,.... ur right

 **katsudom:** not surprised

 **katsudom:** we tend to flock together

 **pitch it chew on that:** u right

 **babecheva:** our support group in these trying times

 

_**pitch it chew on that** changed the chat name to ice skate support group_

 

 **babecheva:** dang

 **nikiminaj:** where is everyone else

 **lolcat:** probably actually doing work unlike you

 **katsudom:** respect your father hes old

 **nikiminaj:** I;M NOT OLD

 **babecheva:** youre going grey

 **nikiminaj:** ITS PLANTINUM

 **babecheva:** plantinum

 **nikiminaj:** yall r forgetting that i can kick WHOMEVER I WISH

 **lolcat:** do it kick me i dont want to be here anyway

 **katsudom:** lol

 **katsudom:** earlier you told me to add you back in once u left lmao

 **babecheva:** LMAO

 **lolcat:** NOT TRUE

 **nikiminaj:** aw our son is so cute

 **katsudom:** Ikr

 **lolcat:** i hate this fucking family

 

 

[ _14:21_ ]

 

 **Superior Gay:** sorry i was busy playing pokemon go

 **pitch it chew on that:** nobody plays pokego anymore

 **Superior Gay:** fuck you then ill get all the gyms

 **nikiminaj:** NOT IF I GET EM FIRST

 **Superior Gay:** what team are you

 **nikiminaj:** valor aka the best team

 **Superior Gay:** um no? mystic is the best

 **nikiminaj:** MYSTIC MORE LIKE MISTAKE

 **pitch it chew on that:** i was instinct

 **nikiminaj:** nobody asked

 **lolcat:** viktor made me get the game and choose valor

 **nikiminaj:** only room for tru strength in this family

 **nikiminaj:** theres like 2 pokestops right by my apartment its gr8

 **Superior Gay:** i literally have to walk a mile just to get to the nearest pokestop this is a scam

 **nikiminaj:** shoulda chose valor

 **pitch it chew on that:** you dont strike me as a valor kind of guy

 **nikiminaj:** well u dont strike me as a 6th place kind of guy

 **nikiminaj:** that was meant to be a compliment i

 **pitch it chew on that:** thanks lmfao

 **nikiminaj:** i gtg

 **babecheva:** oh dear

 

 

[ _22:32_ ]

 

 **pitch it chew on that:**  <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBCYXe5ufas>

 **katsudom:** THATS MY FAVORITE ONE

 **pitch it chew on that:**  <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BXn4bnhOae0>

 **katsudom:** FOUR HOURS LONG

 **nikiminaj:** ive seen tht one omg

 **pitch it chew on that:** i bet u have

 **katsudom:** we are number one is a catchy song tho tbh

 **pitch it chew on that:** true.....

 **nikiminaj:** guys yurio has never taken the harry potter house test

 **pitch it chew on that:** the pottermore one or

 **nikiminaj:** yEA

 **lolcat:** i dont care

 **nikiminaj:** UR ABOUT TO

 **katsudom:** lmao hes dragged yurio to the computer

 **pitch it chew on that:** im hufflepuff

 **katsudom:** aw cute

 **katsudom:** Im gryffindor 

 **katsudom:** viktor is slytherin

 **pitch it chew on that:** figures

 **seung:** im slytherin

 **pitch it chew on that:** they speak

 **babecheva:** i dont like harry potter

 **nekola:** never seen it

 **Inferior Gay:** me neither

 **Superior Gay:** IM RAVENCLAW

 **nikiminaj:** YURIO IS ALSO RAVENCLAW

 **katsudom:** if he got hufflepuff I wouldve died

 **pitch it chew on that:** omfg

 **nikiminaj:** nice another slytherin

 **pitch it chew on that:** viktor and yuuri lowkey look like draco and harry tbh

 **nikiminaj:** ohymgodh...........................

 **katsudom:** youre right............................

 **nikiminaj:** cant believe drarry is canon now

 **lolcat:** i hate all of you

 

 

_December 31, 2016_

[ _05:56_ ]

 

_**katsudom** has added **not a chicken** to the chat_

 

 **pitch it chew on that:** who dis

 **not a chicken:** hi!!! im minami kenjoirou

 **not a chicken:** kenhjoriu

 **not a chicken:** kenjirou 

 **nikiminaj:** ur the guy thats obsessed with yuuri

 **katsudom:** down boy

 **not a chicken:** mnot obsessed!!! hes just a goodskat er!!!!!!

 **pitch it chew on that:** hello i love you

 **not a chicken:** :0000!!! thankss!!

 **katsudom:** we need more figure skaters here

 **nikiminaj:** i can add chris lmfao

 **katsudom:** pls no

 

_**nikiminaj** has added **Nut Button** to the chat_

 

 **pitch it chew on that:** NUT BUTTON

 **Nut Button:** Yo

 **nikiminaj:** whale cum to the support group

 **Nut Button:** Pleased to be here

 **pitch it chew on that:** ew you have caps on

 **nikiminaj:** yuuri still has his capitalization on

 **nikiminaj:** for the i's

 **katsudom:** Idk what ur talkin about

 **pitch it chew on that:** make it end

 **nikiminaj:** i suffer everyday

 **babecheva:** oh my god guys its like 6 am

 **nikiminaj:** memes have no bedtime 

 **katsudom:** why does it say yurios online

 **katsudom:** yurio go TO BED

 **lolcat:** fuck u

 **katsudom:** yurio dont make me go in your room

 **lolcat:** doors locked 

 **katsudom:** will that stop me? no

 **nikiminaj:** yuri u better listen one time he climbed thru my window during an argument

 **pitch it chew on that:** wtf relationship goals

 **katsudom:** he thought I was a robber and nearly punched me

 **nikiminaj:** I HAD EVERY RIGHT TO

 **babecheva:** wtf im going to bed

 **Nut Button:** Who else is ready to watch this hell year end

 **nikiminaj:** go chris changin the subject

 **katsudom:** I AM

 **katsudom:** JESUS CHRIST

 **katsudom:** WE LOST SO MANY PEOPLE?? SO MANY BAD THINGS HAPPENED????

 **pitch it chew on that:** trump

 **katsudom:** we're not americans phichit

 **pitch it chew on that:** o yea lmfao

 **pitch it chew on that:** rip leo

 **katsudom:** OH MY GOD youre right....

 **nikiminaj:** 2017 is just gonna b worse i can feel it

 **not a chicken:** noo!!! u guyshave to ahve hoep!!!!!! beleive!!!!!

 **pitch it chew on that:** i love your typos

 **not a chicken:** sorryu!!! i jsut type rly fast!!!

 **nikiminaj:** no autocorrect we die like men

 **pitch it chew on that:** dude how are u alive without autocorrect 

 **nikiminaj:** bc im not WEAK

 **nikiminaj:** yuuri fell asleep holy shit

 **nikiminaj:** hes so cute

 **pitch it chew on that:** now youre weak

 **nikiminaj:** SHUT UP THIS IS DIFFERENCT;T

 **nikiminaj:** his hair is so soft........................ his skin is so soft.................... his life is so soft...

 **lolcat:** shut up

 **nikiminaj:** u shut up

 **nikiminaj:** his hair fluff

 **nikiminaj:** his heart fluff

 **pitch it chew on that:** ur so gay wtf

 **nikiminaj:** yea bitch so is the rest of us

 **nikiminaj:** im gonna go sleep with my LOVELY FIANCE YUURI KATSUKI goodnight

 **pitch it chew on that:** smh

 **pitch it chew on that:** say i if ur straight

 

 

[ _14:12_ ]

 

 **pitch it chew on that:** wow 

 **babecheva:** what can we say we're all fuckin gay

 **babecheva:** one way or another

 

 

[ _23:45_ ]

 

 **nikiminaj:** GUYS

 **nikiminaj:** SOON

 **katsudom:** ufhifer someone help viktor has vodka

 **nikiminaj:** IMFINE

 **nikiminaj:** WE RUSSIANSAS CAN HANDLE ANYTHIGN

 **pitch it chew on that:** note to self have viktor and yuuri drunk at the same time

 **lolcat:** DO NOT

 **katsudom:** IM NOT DRINKING CALM DOWN

 **lolcat:** jesus

 **pitch it chew on that:** what have yurios virgin eyes seen

 **lolcat:** too much

 **seung:** i hope 2017 will be a kind year to everyone

 **pitch it chew on that:** omgmgm ur so nice ily

 **seung:** thanks

 **Nut Button:** My cat says hello

 **lolcat:** are u a cat person

 **Nut Button:** Yes

 **lolcat:** ha fuck u viktor

 **nikiminaj:** stfu ur like 12

 **lolcat:** i am FIFTEEN

 **katsudom:** guys..... 5 minutes

 **babecheva:** yall im fallin asleep

 **nikiminaj:** pussy

 **babecheva:** u are what u eat

 **nikiminaj:** BYE

 **katsudom:** GHBFGRYHABHFE

 **pitch it chew on that:** HOLY SHIT

 **lolcat:** ew

 **Superior Gay:** lmao

 **nikiminaj:** i literally cannot believe ive been #roasted

 **nikiminaj:** my ass is on fire

 **katsudom:** THREE MINUTES

 **nekola:** soon

 **Inferior Gay:** can't wait

 **nikiminaj:** holy shit r we all here

 **katsudom:** minami isnt here

 **nikiminaj:** MINAMI

 **lolcat:** hes probably asleep lmao what a kid

 **katsudom:** yuri...... hes 17..... and youre 15....

 **lolcat:** whats ur point

 **nekola:** SOON

 **babecheva:** ONE MINUTE

 **nikiminaj:** WAIT YUURI COMEBACK WE HAVE TO DO THE NEW YEARS KISS

 **lolcat:** ew not in front of me you homos

 **nikiminaj:** how am i attracted 2 the same gender when i have none

 **lolcat:** oh yea

 **babecheva:** 30 SECONDS

 **nikiminaj:** YUURI

 **nikiminaj:** DO I HAVE TO KISS MAKKACHIN

 **katsudom:** DUDE chill Im coming back I had to pee

 **babecheva:** last bathroom break of 2016 ideal

 **nekola:** FIVE

 **Superior Gay:** 4

 **not a chicken:** THTREE

 **seung:** 2

 **nikiminaj:** ONE

 **katsudom:** 2016 but every time something bad happens it gets faster

 **katsudom:** oh look at that its 2017

 

 

_January 1, 2017_

[ _00:34_ ]

 

 **lolcat:** stop making out on the couch u fucks i wanna play overwatch

 

 

[ _09:23_ ]

 

 **nikiminaj:** why my vagina hurt

 **katsudom:** viktor imsbfyen

 **nikiminaj:** WHAT the majority of us are vagina owners i need to kno

 **babecheva:** were u havin the nasty

 **katsudom:** NO

 **nikiminaj:** no and thts why i need 2 kno

 **pitch it chew on that:** google says its either an std or a result of rough sex

 **nikiminaj:** well yuuri looks like we found the solution

 **katsudom:** i literally want to die

 **nekola:** why do u know how many people in this chat have vaginas

 **nikiminaj:** mine can smell another from a mile away

 **lolcat:** please never say that again

 **nikiminaj:** IM KIDDING SJFUENFB people have told me

 **Inferior Gay:** so was it an std

 **nikiminaj:** no

 **Superior Gay:** damn yuuri

 **katsudom:** SBFUGEFIBSND

 **nikiminaj:** he said damn vitya its tight i said yea bitch u right

 **katsudom:** I AHTE YOIU

 **lolcat:** i literally am a child stop

 **nikiminaj:** o yea sorry son

 **pitch it chew on that:** its 2017 dont start the year like this

 **nikiminaj:** ur just mad that my pussy pops severely and urs dont

 **pitch it chew on that:** my pussy can beat urs anyway

 **pitch it chew on that:** its hopped up on testosterone

 **nikiminaj:** o yea hows tht goin

 **pitch it chew on that:** p good!! im gonna get top surgery soon

 **lolcat:** smh

 **nikiminaj:** hes jealous

 **nikiminaj:** its ok yurio ull get urs soon enough

 **lolcat:** not soon enough

 

 

_January 2, 2017_

[ _23:56_ ]

 

 **seung:** this is probably weird but the only thought on my mind right now is the vine where the guy goes "siri whats my name" and the phone is like "youre tom but you asked me to call you vagina" and it goes on like that

 **pitch it chew on that:** thats the most youve ever said in this chat and honestly same

 **nikiminaj:** <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=idvjXfH0x60>

**seung:** i owe you my life

 **nikiminaj:** np m8

 

 

_January 3, 2017_

[ _02:45_ ]

 

 **nikiminaj:** remember when dan was bothering phil and phil yelled at him to shut up? shook

 **katsudom:** babe just go the fuck to sleep

 

 

[ _12:32_ ]

 

 **lolcat:** viktor and katsudon are skating to we are number one please help

 **babecheva:** NO DONT ITS HILARIOUS

 **pitch it chew on that:** record it

 **babecheva:** yakov is

 **lolcat:** i am suffering

 **seung:** lmfao

 **Nut Button:** Isn't that an old meme now

 **Nut Button:** From last year

 **pitch it chew on that:** tru.........

 **babecheva:** BYE VIKTOR JUST MADE YURIO JOIN

 **babecheva:** what a happy family

 **pitch it chew on that:** amazing

 **Superior Gay:** all of russia is crying

 

 

[ _13:12_ ]

 

 **lolcat:** i hate my life

 **babecheva:** oh please you were laughing

 

 

[ _17:43_ ]

 

 **nikiminaj:**  I wake with the sight of Thomas the Tank engine at the foot of my bed. I welcome him to my home and offer him some water. He declines and says “Come with me to Sodor.” I come with to Sodor where I meet Sir Toptam hat. He tells me that Sodor is where I should live for the rest of my life. I said yes and came to the junction to get a house. I wake up and realize that it was a dream, and wish I was back. My parents take me to therapy because I know I was there. I was told to forget Sodor and Thomas, but I can’t. I love Thomas and I want to live with him forever.

 **katsudom:** I am literally gonna kick u out

 **pitch it chew on that:** of all things

 **Nut Button:** Omg

 **not a chicken:** thomas the tnak???

 **nikiminaj:**  I sexually identify as john cena. ever since I was a boy I dreamed of five knuckle shuffling hot sticky loads on to disgusting wrestlers. people tell me that it is impossible for someone to be john cena and that I am fucking retarded but I dont care. I am having surgeons install five knuckle shuffles and you cant see me next week. I would like you to all refer to me as john cena from now on. thank you for being so understanding

 **katsudom** : STOP 

 **katsudom:** he's literally laughing from across the room

 **katsudom:** this guy

 **katsudom:** VIKTORS TRYING TO TELAMY HPONE

 **katsudom:** rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

 **katsudom:** Omg hai ___^ I’m anon-san and I absolutely luuuv @__@ anime <3 and my fav is naurto!!! Okies so anyways, im going to tell you about the BEST day of my life when I met my hot husband sasuke!! <333333333 OMFGZ HE WAS SOOOOO FREAKIN KAWAII IN PERSON!!! Supa kawaii desu!!!!!!!! ^___________________________________^ When I walked onto Tokyo street =____=I looked up and saw…SASUKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333!!!! “ KONNICHIWA OMGZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ SUPA SUPA SUPA KAWAII SASUKE-SAMA!!!!!” I yelled n____n then he turned chibi then un-chibi!! he looked at me [O.O;;;;;;;;;;;] and then he saw how hot I am *___* he grabbed my hand and winked ~_^ then pulled me behind a pocky shop o_o and started to kiss me!!!!!! [OMG!!! HIS TOUNGE TASTED LIKE RAMEN!!! RLY!! >.> <.< >.< (O) (O) (O)] then I saw some baka fat bitch watching us and I could tell she was undressing him with her eyes!!!!!!! [ -___________-;;;;; OMG I COULDN’T BELIEVE IT EITHER!!! (ò_ó) (ò_ó) (ò_ó)] so I yelled “UH UH BAKA NEKO THAT’S MY MAN WHY DON’T YOU GO HOOK UP WITH NARUTO CAUSE SASUKE-SAMA LOVES ME!!! (ò_ó)” then sasuke held me close =^= and said he would only ever love me and kissed me again!!!!!!! ** (O)/ then we went to his apartment and banged all night long and made 42 babies and they all became ninjas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nyaaaaa!!! (^___<)

 **pitch it chew on that:** screenshotted

 **katsudom:** NO THAT WAS VITKOR

 **nikiminaj:** vitkor

 **nikiminaj:** sasuke is kinda hot tho ngl

_**katsudom** has left the chat_

 

_**nikiminaj** has added **katsudom** to the chat_

 

 **nikiminaj:** no leaving we die like men

 **katsudom:** Im not a man

 **nikiminaj:** no leaving we die like genderfluid warriors

 

 

[ _19:23_ ]

 

 **seung:** i just had a thought

 **seung:** yurio, since your screen name is "lolcat"

 **seung:** does that make you a furry

 

_**lolcat** has left the chat_

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> this was inspired by that one chat fic everyone likes including me yall know the one the skatesquad one 
> 
> i wrote this for fun also i dont know anything about overwatch
> 
> im kin with viktor so 99% of this was just projecting myself onto him lmao. also before yall kill me on this: viktor is agender but uses he/him. let him be an agender boy. pls,
> 
> [tumblr](http://haikuyus.tumblr.com/)
> 
> [yoi sideblog](http://viktcrnikiforov.tumblr.com/)


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